Recent Comments

3/21/21, 1:15 AM
Really hot. I'm liking the way its going so far as it seems realistic for the motivations. Only thing I would really like was of it expands outside if the family to include more cops. Would be great if Erik offered up his partner to take his place. Seems like the kinda scumbag move he would make or it could be part of breaking him down since his thing is the uniform. Cant imagine his partner would be a great guy if he sticks with Erik.
Jack
3/20/21, 7:19 PM
Fuck, this was hot. I'm so not into foot stuff, but I genuinely came while I was reading the interaction between Vincent and Erik. You're so good that you're making me like stuff I don't like! And the moment where Erik admitted that he regretted nothing, and so neither would Vincent? God, it was amazing. Quality writing once again. I mentioned this before, but it's so cathartic to read as these bastards get what's coming to them. There's so much more that can happen, and I'm genuinely excited to see where it goes. I'm sorry about life being shitty. It happens, but it's never fun. There isn't much I can do, other than compliment you and say that your writing ability continues to improve with every chapter. I'm happy to help you proofread the stories, if you would like. Let me know.
3/20/21, 3:36 PM
Take all the time you need. We don't want writer burnout. For Eli, might I suggest not dumbing him down? Maybe he's the one who partially brake away from his reprogramming.
3/20/21, 3:35 PM
Superb isn't the right word, "fanfreakingtastic" is much much better! You are truly talented and I'm grateful I get to enjoy the fruits of your creative labor. Mars does seem like a good idea sometimes doesn't it? Hopefully the writing process is both cathartic and enjoyable for you so sending good vibes your way. This IS my favorite story on here!
3/20/21, 9:09 AM
the wait is definitely worth it! you are killing it right now,this is one of my favorite series on this site these days. shame that I need to wait for the next chapter now xD I would read that whole thing in one sitting in a heartbeat. I probably will once it's completed keep up the good work,we appreciate it
3/20/21, 8:27 AM
I'm intrigued on how things will develop with Eli, I enjoy when smart characters are the enthralled ones and are not dumbed Down, there is a lot of ways to play with someone who is smart having so many confusing feelings, and It's very intriguing. I also gotta say that I really enjoyed how you described his utter confusion and Jealousy, I think his envy is a very strong defining character trait to explore and what I enjoyed the most is that so far aside from obviously Vincent, Eli is the most fully realized character to me, down to his feelings rather than fully changing just kinda switching his hatred and anger for Vincent into his father and also discovering how much he hates Erik makes me wonder if Vincent might use Eli to torture Erik if he ever were to "reward" Eli for anything, he'd be spiteful enough to get his kicks not only at obeying his baby brother, but also making his older brother suffer as well, middle child syndrome taken to extremes.
3/19/21, 11:12 PM
Great idea with the Aware mode. And very hotly told. This chapter made me like Erik. But watching him be aware of what he is to become was a great punishment that I enjoyed seeing. Actually, the only punishment I can see is for him to always be in the Aware mode or else he's enjoying it. So it is interesting how this will play out. I look forward to the next one (kind of bummed out I caught up and have to wait now)
3/17/21, 9:25 AM
As usual an amazing chapter, looks like this is proper revenge, but seems like Erik hits our protagonist’s nerves the hardest, I wonder if Eli’s punishment will be more relaxed than Erik’s
3/17/21, 2:19 AM
I've been waiting for a story like this for ages! If you didn't plan it from the start I'd like to nominate Sam and Mac for enslavement as well